Japanese Affectations
...written on 2000-11-20, @ 16:42:43
Tales of Kim's Life in Japan
Mon November 20, 2000
This entry deals with affectations and affections, which may be hard to separate in Japanese culture. Heck, the way I've been feeling lately, they may be hard to distinguish in myself.
I had a great class the other night at the X branch. The branch boss, Mr. X and I got along famously and the students responded well to us both. After the class, Mr. X asked me if I went to bars and I told him I didn't smoke or drink, so no, bars weren't high on my list. He said "too bad". Wait, was he asking me out? And if he was, are bars the only place to go? Anyway, the evening ended well and I said "see you later".
The next day, I see Mr. X at the main office, he sees me, and doesn't bat an eyelash. No additional acknowledgement came after I approached him and said hello. Hmm. I asked Fred what could be the matter. Fred didn't seem too overly concerned. Some of you might recall something similar happened with me and another teacher from a different branch. They act very different when they are in their own territory, but once they get to the main office, they have to put on their serious faces.
Sheesh. Anyone who knows me knows I don't do serious for long, so I cornered Mr. X in the hallway in front of the drink machine ALONE. It looked like he wanted to say more, and maybe his English isn't to that level of expression and maybe we don't know each other that well yet, and maybe another person was about to come around the corner at any second and . . ., but what he did say was "Please come teach at my branch again." I thought, is that all you want me to do, but then I realized that what he said was the greatest thing he could say and I smiled and said, "Ok.", and then the awaited interlopers came through the hallway and our conversation was over.
I feel rather exasperated. Here's another cultural adaptation I have to take on, and there are pros and cons of course. In training, John said that there are only two acceptable emotions that Japanese can express at work, being tired and being happy. You might want to take that down to one, John. I haven't seen too much real happiness around here.
Friday night I had a great time at the Marunouchi branch with Okumura-san. We had to read dialogues to the students for the listening tests they're having in the next few weeks. The first time through we read them straight, but the second time around we really got into it and were cracking ourselves up. The students were sitting there all serious like while their two teachers giggled uncontrollably. Our laughter was finally contagious however, and the students appreciated the break from the boring routine. Afterwards, Okurmura-san shook my hand and said we were a great team. Now I will be interested to see if he will follow the same pattern as the other two teachers the next time we meet.
I am not looking for romance, well, not yet anyway. I am looking for warm friendships and I know it is going to take time.