Star Bores
...written on 07.30.02, @ 12:31 p.m.
Tue July 30, 2002
Here is my review of the new Star Wars movie:
Star Wars no Eiga wa zenzen omoshiro kunakatta yo. (The Star Wars movie was completely uninteresting)
Engiwa hidoi deshita. (The acting was terrible)
Daikon-yakusha ga seizoroi datta yo. (There were many "radish-like" actors)
Ongaku mo mattaku kando shimasen deshita. (The soundtrack also was uninspiring)
Honto ni jikan to okane no muda deshita. (It really was a waste of time and money).
My review is a little simplified as I am going to try and express it at work today in Japanese, for the benefit of my Japanese co-workers.
Also, I am going to ask John and Brian to each give me 900 yen. That will make a total of 1800 yen (US$15) that I spent on seeing the above disaster. I am making reclamations to them because many times I expressed my doubts about the movie from what I had seen of the trailer, but they both insisted that the trailer was a misrepresentation and that they enjoyed the flick.
Hee. I don't usually get so bent out of shape about things, but I felt that the movie SUCKED!! Honestly, really, truly!
Ok, wait, calm down, Kim. Not everyone goes to see a movie for the application of Stanislavsky's acting techniques, yes, I know. Not everyone goes seeking substantial emotional and psychological substance, my young Padawan learner, I know, I know. Not everyone takes exception to Yoda's "I have to hobble with a cane, but gimme my Jedi "this is your life" light saber and watch me do the twist" antics, yes, I am aware of this and accept your and anyone's right to adore, love, like, or whatever, this movie, but as you can see, it certainly wasn't my cup of blue milk.
I did find a few things interesting (Kamino, the water world of the cloning company, the scenery on Naboo, the mid-space explosions in the asteroid belt and the furry purple thing in the Genosian gladiator ring), but a few interesting things do not a good movie make.
I like to be involved in a movie. Make me care about the characters or the plot! Don't just show me what a big special effects pecker you have, because really, to me, size doesn't matter.